How Not To Propose

Why are we writing a page on how NOT to propose? Because getting engaged is serous business and a little fun never hurts. Besides, sometimes you just need to spell things out for peeps because common sense is not always that common.

Red hand with NO! written on the palm

Top 10 Ways NOT To Propose…

10. Through a friend…
9. On a Post-it!
8.  In a language you don’t speak…
7.  With your mouth full…
6. On Facebook!
5. After she tells you she’s pregnant…
4. While she’s sleeping…
3. With the words: ” I won’t find anyone better.”
2. In a language she doesn’t understand…
1. Without a ring…

A Perfect Proposal Is All In The Timing

Sure we’re having a little fun here but you’d be surprised by some of the stories we hear.

The most important take-away is that a marriage proposal is serious and needs to be entered into with a lot of forethought and discussion. It’s important that you talk to each other about getting engaged and married.

Getting engaged under most circumstances shouldn’t be a surprise for either one of you… BUT the proposal should be!

Yes, times have changed. We live in a world of Facebook and Tweets where voyeurism and exhibitionism are the norm. Don’t let that influence your judgement, they represent everything a marriage proposal isn’t and are exactly how NOT to propose.

This is one of the most intimate events in your life and should be kept that way.

It’s Time For Tradition Even If It’s Not Your Thing

Focus on all the traditional ingredients that make a wedding proposal special. Chivalry, respect and romance are all part of the package and even though you don’t need to ask her parents for their blessing, it’s a nice touch that both she and her parents will remember…

Meet with them and let them know your intentions (without asking for permission). Instead ask for their blessings. Even the most modern and liberated girl will love that you did it.

Get down on one knee, know exactly what you are going to say, rehearse your lines, tell her why you love her and what she means to you. Lay it on thick without any inhibitions or pride, and you’ll both cherish the moment for the rest of your lives.

If you haven’t already, make sure to read the flip side of this article, our advice on HOW-TO propose.

Top 10 Engagement Rings NOT To Propose With!

An engaement ring with carrots instead of diamonds10. Stolen
9.  Borrowed
8.  Fake
7. Paper
6.  Edible
5. One that YOU used once before…
4. Any type of ring that includes  the word “cyber” …
3. One that’s made for her toes.
2. One that’s best described as “cute”
1. One where you say “I thought that’s what you meant by 2 carats.”

The ALL-Important Engagement Ring

An important part of understanding how NOT to propose centers around the all-important ring. The engagement ring is a symbol of your union and knowing her, her sense of style, and what’s important to her is key.

First things first. You need to figure out if she wants to pick out the ring herself. If she does, a lot of the other things you need to think about are no longer relevant.

If you’re sure that she’d rather pick out the ring herself but you still want the proposal to be a surprise you have two options.

Engagement Ring Options

Think of some clever placeholder like a simple silver or gold band with a heart (and no stones) and put it in an actual ring box from the jewelry store you plan on taking her shopping to.  Tell her, you are offering her your heart to take with her shopping. The ring will end up being a sentimental memento for the two of you.

Or…. speak with her friends and do your best to guess what she’d like and offer it to her while letting her know that the jewelry store is expecting the two of you to visit to exchange it for her ideal ring.

If she is the type who’d rather you choose it and have it be a complete surprise, make sure you do the necessary reconnaissance work to figure out what kind of engagement ring she would like. You can also take our engagement ring quiz, it just may help you with your ring options and your proposal.

Picking the right ring is an important part of the proposal. A lot of thought and care should go into choosing the one piece of jewelry she’ll be wearing everyday for the rest of her life. You don’t want her to write to us one day, like this poor girl, saying I really hate my engagement ring.

The best way to NOT make any mistakes is to keep it simple, be creative, and tailor your proposal to her and your relationship. Heed our advice. The last thing you want is to end up on a list of proposal flops or in an article on How NOT to Propose.