How to propose is one of the toughest struggles guys go through. There's so much
pressure on getting it right but in the end, all you really need to do is keep a
few things in mind and follow YOUR heart.
Your Proposal is ALL About Her
This will never be as special to you as it is to her, no matter how much of a
romantic fool you are. So make sure you approach the whole thing from her point
of view and not yours.
She'll giggle with her friends and tell her family all
about the proposal and how dreamy it was. She'll share the event with her future
children and grandchildren highlighting how special it was....No pressure! :-)
So, the first step of figuring out how to propose is all about customizing the
proposal so that she knows it's personal and tailored to her. It's important
that she sees that you took the time and made the effort to make it special. We
can't all do as this guy did but we can aspire to come pretty close!
A Perfect Proposal Is All In The Timing
There's a ton of excitement immediately after you get engaged. Announcements,
congratulations and small celebrations abound. You'll also both be a little
distracted thinking about the nuptials and your future life together, so it's
important to think about how to propose and also when to propose.
If it's a busy time for her at work or at school postpone your proposal until
after things cool down so that she can truly savor and enjoy getting engaged.
Public Display Or Private Time
You know her better than anyone else at this point. What kind of proposal
would she prefer? The "Jumbo-Tron" at the local sports arena or an intimate
evening for two?
When thinking about how to propose, think about how she reacts in public
situations and what her favorite date was. Did she love it when you were both
the center of attention riding mechanical bulls at your local hangout or does
she prefer quiet walks in the countryside while holding hands and listening to
the sounds of nature? How about evenings spent with close family and friends
playing games and talking up a storm?
By thinking back on your relationship and what she's really enjoyed while
you've been dating will give you the clues you need to figure out whether to go
public or private with your proposal.
Thanks For The Memories
Girls gush and love to dish about romantic events in their lives. Think
about capturing your proposal on video. Set up your cam on auto-record or have a
friend secretly tape the event. She'll be dazed by your proposal and will want
to remember every single second of it, so having it on tape for her is always a
good thing! Or if kept a secret, the video makes a wonderfully romantic
anniversary gift for some time in the future.
Simple Proposals Are Sometimes Best
"Go big or go home" may work great for some but it isn't always the best
route to take. The more elaborate the scheme the more chances for things to go
wrong. The most important part of your proposal is heartfelt sentiment so don't
get all worked up concocting some crazy plan if that's just not the type of guy
you are. Go with what feels right for the
both of you and don't be afraid of simplicity.
X Marks The Spot
We've covered the 'when' of how to propose now we need to consider
the 'where'. think about all the places you've been together or where
you've dreamed of going. What has the most meaning for the two of you? Think
about where you went on your first date? Where you first declared your love for
one another? Your favorite restaurant? Give it some thought and you'll come up
with the perfect spot!
It's ALL In The Details
Making your proposal special is all in the details, and details require
planning. Cover your bases and think about all the details that will make your
proposal that much more special. Even the simplest proposal will be so much
better if you pay attention to the details.
If you plan on doing it in a restaurant, let the staff know beforehand so
that they reserve the best table for you and are extra attentive. Arrange to
have her favorite flowers on the table (which you can take home as a memento)
and have a friend set up a romantic scene at home while you guys are out with a
chilled bottle of champagne and another bouquet of flowers. Needless to say,
this isn't a time to stop for gas so make sure your tank is full and other
incidentals are taken car of. How to propose and making it special is really
about the details.
Ask Her Parents For Their Blessing
Asking her father or parents for her hand in marriage is an old tradition
that many no longer subscribe to for too many reasons to mention here. However,
for some girls (and many parents) it shows a level of respect and maturity and
many brides-to-be think it's charming.
If you feel that this is something that would be appropriate for you and your
situation we recommend that you ask for their blessing rather than permission to
marry. It keeps up the old tradition, demonstrates the same integrity but
doesn't position their daughter as a piece of property.
Yep... The Engagement Ring
Thinking of proposing without a ring? You can't, it's a key part of the
ritual! We've dedicated many pages of this site to
engagement rings and figuring out how to choose the right one, so we won't
go on about it here. Just know that without a ring, even if it's a plastic one
that came out of a bubble gum machine, it really isn't a proposal.
Don't Worry, Be Happy!
Don't let the process of figuring out how to propose get you all tied up in
knots. You found the one! So, give yourself time and put thought into it and
you'll come up with the perfect proposal.
Want to see how all these elements work together? One of our readers (Dori) wrote in
to tell us about her perfect proposal. Her man took the time to go through all
these steps to figure out how to propose to Dori—his Dori, the girl he
knows and loves. It may not be perfect
for everyone, but it was perfect for her—and that's the whole point!
Dori's Perfect Proposal
The perfect diamond ring, some Louboutin black pumps, an Herve Leger dress and a
romantic dinner for two at Chicago's finest restaurant.... Just a few of Dori's
Thinking about how to propose should be fun and exciting. Whether you choose
to go all out publicly or set up a romantic dinner at home what will make it
special is that you're starting a new life together and that you've put some
thought into how you want that life to begin.